Marco Rubio Wins Coveted Role of Republican Piñata


The lazy gits at the major polling houses still haven’t produced any national updates since last week’s Republican debate, but today Monmouth released a poll for New Hampshire. As usual, I’m more interested in change than absolute levels, and on that score the big winner from last week was Marco Rubio. (Trump and Carson still lead, with Rubio in third.) Anyway, I assume this means that Rubio now has a big fat target painted on his back, and this means we’ll soon be treated to a brand new insult from Donald Trump. The obvious route for Trump is to mock Rubio’s inability to balance his own checkbook, but I’m hoping for something more original. Immigration is too obvious. Water bottle jokes are stale. Maybe something about disloyalty to Jeb Bush? Or maybe a tweet about Marco’s favorite business book being Dress for Success? Maybe he should suggest that Rubio is the Cersei Lannister of Republicans? Is that too esoteric? Or a great pop culture reference?

Anyway, Rubio better watch out. It’s his turn to get knifed in the back in the great scrum called the GOP primary.