Polish Kid: “My Half-Year of Hell With Christian Fundamentalists”

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There are a million things that are funny about this. It’s almost like someone made it up; if they did, we’re playing the willing suckers here at Mother Jones.

The facts are simple. (1) A Polish student named Michael came to America for a study abroad term. (2) He was placed with an evangelical family in North Carolina. (3) Hilarity ensued.

Here are the highlights:

– The first thing the family told Michael when he landed at the airport was “Child, our Lord sent you half-way around the world to bring you to us.” Michael immediately wanted to get back on the plane to Poland.

– Every Monday, the family gathered around the kitchen table to talk about sex. The parents had not had sex in 17 years.

– The family told Michael that he had the devil in his heart. The family told Michael that his mother had the devil in her heart.

– Michael realized part of the way through his stay that the family had only agreed to house him because he could help them set up an evangelical church in Poland. A bit opportunistic, no?

How is this not a sitcom already? To Mike, we’re not all like that, we promise. Perhaps you should swing by the Bay Area next time and sample some of our “San Francisco Values.” And to Wonkette, who found this on Der Spiegel, keep fighting the good fight, folks.

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WE'LL BE BLUNT

We need to start raising significantly more in donations from our online community of readers, especially from those who read Mother Jones regularly but have never decided to pitch in because you figured others always will. We also need long-time and new donors, everyone, to keep showing up for us.

In "It's Not a Crisis. This Is the New Normal," we explain, as matter-of-factly as we can, what exactly our finances look like, how brutal it is to sustain quality journalism right now, what makes Mother Jones different than most of the news out there, and why support from readers is the only thing that keeps us going. Despite the challenges, we're optimistic we can increase the share of online readers who decide to donate—starting with hitting an ambitious $300,000 goal in just three weeks to make sure we can finish our fiscal year break-even in the coming months.

Please learn more about how Mother Jones works and our 47-year history of doing nonprofit journalism that you don't find elsewhere—and help us do it with a donation if you can. We've already cut expenses and hitting our online goal is critical right now.

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