Breaking News: Britney Shaves Head, Gets Tattoo

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Was she just drunk, or, after dispatching Fed-Ex, has she decided to bat for the other team?

More likely the former than the latter, but no one knows for sure. Britney is reported to have grabbed the clippers from the aghast stylist’s hands and chopped off her girly locks herself. And a series of sketchy reports places Brit in and out of rehab.

Maybe she’s making a statement about how little she has to do to be mobbed by the press. Or how absurd conventional notions of beauty are? (One fan who stood outside the tattoo parlor while Britney got inked told the camera crews also on the spot, “Her head is completely shaved. It looks terrible.”) Or maybe Brit’s just gone from imitating Madonna to imitating Sinéad O’Connor. Congress, watch out!

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