Alberto Gonzales Is Going to Write an Awfully Short Tell-All

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AlbertoGonzalesClap.jpg Former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales, head clown for some of the Bush Administration’s wackiest episodes, will write a tell-all book about his experiences at the Department of Justice. I find this curious. After all, Gonzales is the guy who went before the Senate Judiciary Committee to answer questions about the U.S. Attorneys scandal and managed to utter the words “I don’t recall” 64 times in five hours. (Relevant Daily Show clip here.) Considering his all-encompassing amnesia about his work, what’s he going to put in the memoir?

My guess? The book will be three pages.

Page one: Table of Contents.
Page two: “Everything was awesome. I did nothing wrong, certainly nothing I should go to jail for, haha!”
Page three: About the Author.

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FACT:

Mother Jones was founded as a nonprofit in 1976 because we knew corporations and the wealthy wouldn't fund the type of hard-hitting journalism we set out to do.

Today, reader support makes up about two-thirds of our budget, allows us to dig deep on stories that matter, and lets us keep our reporting free for everyone. If you value what you get from Mother Jones, please join us with a tax-deductible donation today so we can keep on doing the type of journalism 2020 demands.

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