Diamond Shaped Phones Are a Girl’s Best Friend?

Sony Ericsson's Jalou, via Gizmodo

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While everything from laptops to Scrabble is getting dipped in Pepto Bismol and glitter to attract the ladies, Sony Ericsson has one-upped the rest of the gendered marketing world with the soon to be released Jalou phone.

Rather than slap some pink on it and call it a day, Sony Ericsson “explored art, architecture and furniture trends whilst delving deep into the couture and fashion world” to determine just what the ladies would be looking for in a cell phone in 2010. Evidently plaid is out but, “structured forms, intricate corners, hidden depths” are in. Um…sure.

The phone is shaped like a facet-cut diamond, and “depth” refers to a “variety of different shine and matt [sic] finishes,” not tech specs. The key pad also features diamond shaped keys—since concern about conflict diamonds was so last year.

The Jalou isn’t targeted to every woman. Rather, it is the lifestyle choice for the young, urban, and single with disposable income: “Share the good life. Chat on the treadmill, text in the taxi, snap and share photos from the club: Jalou™ lets you share your life in style.”

How does the Jalou offer help to do this?

“The two inch screen’s clever design means that at the touch of a button the screen becomes a mirror, offering a discreet way to make sure you look as good as your mobile phone. It is also the first Sony Ericsson to feature Walk Mate step counter, to help you stay in shape wherever you go. It also has an exclusive fashion interface which automatically updates with zodiac signs and special events throughout the year.”

Vanity, body image, and horoscopes aren’t the only stereotypes Sony Ericcson made sure cover. Catfights will also be all the rage in 2010. Jalou is derived from the french, jalouse meaning jealousy.

Strangely the phone does not actually come in pink direct from Ericcson, but in the semi-precious colors Deep Amethyst, Aquamarine Blue, and Onyx Black. You’ll have to splurge for the Dolce & Gabanna edition, which comes in “sparkling rose” complete with 24-gold karat plating, to really fulfill your gendered fashion needs—just forget about that pesky wage gap.

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DONALD TRUMP & DEMOCRACY

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And we need your support like never before, to fight back against the existential threats American democracy faces. Fundraising for nonprofit media is always a challenge, and we need all hands on deck right now. We have no cushion; we leave it all on the field.

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