MotherJones Blog: Huckabee: The Search for a Sobriquet

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Huckabee: The Search for a Sobriquet

Mi·chael Huck·a·bee. It's a hell of a name, the best by far of the Republican field. And now that Huckabee is an anointed member of the top tier, the search for a viable nickname is on. Entries so far include:

The Huckster. Used by: Rush Limbaugh, various right-wing blogs. Verdict: Too obvious.

Tax Hike Mike. Used by: The Club for Growth. Verdict: Lame, uninspired.

Triple Wide. Used by: Arkansans punning on Huckabee's erstwhile heft and the extra large trailer his family lived in during renovations at the governor's mansion. Verdict: Dated.

The Huck. Used by: Headline-writers everywhere. Verdict: Scores points for simplicity.

Since none of those entries quite cuts it, I had high hopes for a new Huckabee appraisal by Paul Greenberg, grizzled Arkansas media eminence (he editorializes for the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette and has a Pulitzer under his belt—from 1969), and coiner of "Slick Willie." Alas, Greenberg tosses a handful of darts—"one Michael Dale Huckabee," "Brother Huckabee," "this year's Man from Hope," and, of course, "the Huck"—but none really hits bullseye. So, readers, what should we call this guy?

—Justin Elliott

Posted by: David Prater on 12/20/07 at 5:07 PM Respond

Huck-thin?

Posted by: capt on 12/20/07 at 6:43 PM Respond

Oh, rounding up those AIDS pukes was MY idea! I also told that pudgy little fuck where to hide - it's not MY fault that he's so stupid he can't even pass SEMINARY. He kept cleaning out my refrigerator too - that's why I took away his appetite. He can't do ANYTHING without My help. The dog wasn't MY idea though - the Huckster trained all his children that way. The way I see it, if I can get voters to only vote for their religion, can WW4 be far away? And with a Know-nothing like Huckabee in office, getting him to start Armageddon will be as simple as telling him Islamic folk are EVIL - and he already believes that!

Cordially,
Satan --> Bringing you political leaders for the best part of a decade!

Posted by: Satan on 12/20/07 at 7:29 PM Respond

Misogynist?

Homophobe?

Godbag?

Posted by: kelly g. on 12/20/07 at 8:38 PM Respond

Mr. President will do.

Posted by: Jim Gueno on 12/20/07 at 8:58 PM Respond

Fike! Muckedyoube!
Foly Hucker
Swinging Dawg Daddy

Posted by: Jim W in Delaware on 12/20/07 at 10:36 PM Respond

I like capt's 'Huck Thin', though relating this sleazy zealot to such a ground-breaking book isn't so hot.
He seems very taken with himself. What about: Mike Hearts Huckabee? Or, to address his view of his relationship to the heavens, God's Lil' Cousin?

Posted by: Paul Miller on 12/21/07 at 5:14 AM Respond

Hickaboob.

Posted by: Yossarian on 12/21/07 at 6:01 AM Respond

Gawd-dawg

***

Except dyslectic atheists’ believe there is no DOG.

Posted by: capt on 12/21/07 at 6:12 AM Respond

Mike Gastricbypassabee?

Posted by: eyes_open on 12/21/07 at 8:18 AM Respond