Chalk it up to the Demi Moore/Ashton Kutcher effect, or better yet, just call it creepy: Northern California is bracing for an influx of cougars in about a month. And I’m not talking about the animals; I’m talking about the ladies, specifically those in the 35+ age bracket who are seeking young men with better than average verility.
National Single Cougars Convention
Single cougars from all over America will converge on the Silicon Valley, the ONLY major metropolitan area in America with a surplus of single men, many of whom are young, educated, attractive, and prosperous, but lacking in experience with women.
7:30pm – Complimentary appetizers from Trader Vic’s, as long as they last.
8pm – Entertaining Keynote Address with author Francesca Gentille and Tahil Gesyuk, her romantic partner, who is 14 years younger.
9pm-Midnight – The Cougar Ball, featuring dancing to your favorite hits. At approximately 11pm, one cougar at the Convention will be crowned MISS COUGAR AMERICA and receive prizes, including her choice of the upcoming Singles Halloween Cruise or the Spring Baja Cruise, courtesy of The Singles Travel Company, plus a Cougar Kit from Cardeaux Cosmetics, valued at over $100. To be eligible to win, the lucky Cougar must be present at the convention, legally single and at least 40 years of age.
BONUS: The first 50 women to arrive will receive free samples from Cardeaux Cosmetics!
Yes, you read correctly. There will be prizes and even a coronation. I’ll be out of town that day, but if I were around, you can bet your bottom dollar I’d be tempted to go watch.