«--Previous Post | Blog Index | Next Post--»

Why Not Smoke 'Em Since you Got 'Em?: The "Boys of Satire" Returning to Work Much, Much Too Soon

For an armchair sociologist and culture critic, I'm hilariously wrong about how people will behave.

When I heard that Stewart and Colbert were returning to the air just after the New Year, I had two responses: bafflement and fear. First, my bafflement.

Given the pace, the stress, the monstrous pressure of being funny four nights a week about stuff that had happened only hours before, I'd thought the 'talent' would be secretly thanking the gods for this unplanned vacation from their own success. I assumed that was why they were being so ostentatiously generous with their support of the writers - so they could stay out til spring and the big names could sleep for six months and luxuriate in their ignorance for a change. I pictured Colbert and Stewart showering their gleeful families every morning with confetti made of unread NY Times, then spending the day in their jammies ginning up fake emails from the network brass dissing the writers and threatening their families. Instead, these guys are so desperate to get back on the air, they're willing to humiliate themselves to do so. I know these guys are innately funny, but nightly-broadcast-with-no-help funny? Why on earth are Letterman, Colbert et al so desperate to get back on the air?

Y'all know I love me some satire shows. So much so that, pre-strike, I worried about my boys spiraling into drugs, drinking and sordid sex scandals - VH1 Behind the Music-style - from all the pressure. Turns out that they're as addicted to what they do as we are to watching them do it. I 'spoze I shouldn't be so surprised. God knows I churn out book after book, post after post for far less money and with every chance of being either ignored or excoriated (see: your comments). Wrong again. Note to self: performing is as much an irrestible calling as punditry. Who knew?

Now, my fear. I'd been trying to wean myself off television for a looong time now. With a personality as addictive as mine, It's such a time waster; I want my kids to grow up watching only in moderation, unlike their mother. I'd sooner show you nude, secretly snapped photos of me than tell you what, and how much, I watch. So, once the strike hit, I cravenly made the plunge, knowing I wouldn't miss much this time of year. Smugly, I dragged my 'leventy-seven boxes back to the cable folks. You'd have thought I was donating both kidneys to Iraqi war refugees the way I carried on. No one expected the strike to be over before the end of January by which time I figured I'd have detox'd enough to resist the siren call of Battlestar Galactica, 30 Rock and...never mind. I couldn't wait to lord my cultural ignorance over you lowly TV gawkers at dinner parties - "The Office? What office, I don't understand. Oh. TV. I'm reading Proust" - obnoxious as those wankers who spend a semester abroad (in Canada) and come back pretending to have forgotten English.

I could never have given up TV with late night satire still airing, never.

What the f*&^ am I supposed to do now?

Comments

Good Piece!

I'm with ya 100%

Posted by: capt on 12/24/07 at 2:04 PM Respond

Funny! I miss Stewart and Colbert, but am willing to wait until they could come back with all arsenals in place. But I will watch.

Posted by: Yvonne Thompson on 12/25/07 at 2:37 PM Respond

Stewart & Colbert (and Leno & O'Brien, for that matter) are being heavily pressured by their respective networks to start producing new episodes, even without writers.

Letterman is actually trying to negotiate an interim deal with writers (with the Guild's blessing) to return to the airwaves with a full writing staff.

Posted by: Strannix on 12/26/07 at 7:22 AM Respond

But the idea of a "writer's union" is absurd. As is any union of professionals or artistic types. At best it mocks the real trade unions. Artists (writers, scientists, athletes) are not interchangeable. There is no need, or even point, to collective bargaining. Contracts are a matter of individual negotiation. But of course, with today's rampant conservativism, the real working class is disinterested.

Posted by: juliod on 12/26/07 at 3:01 PM Respond

Arts related unions are great for providing health care benefits and pensions to creatives who do NOT fit into the corporate structure.

Also, artists are notoriously underpaid because they do what they do for love more than money. They are easily taken advantage of by executive types looking to increase their bottom line.

WGA, SAG, AEA, AFTRA, AGMA and the like are very needed organizations for those in the performings arts.

Posted by: Suzanne Childers on 12/26/07 at 4:02 PM Respond

Good point, Juliod, these individuals can call themselves whatever they want. I sure hope they spend Labour Day marching with the rest of us in support of low income workers and laid off workers. The good thing about their "strike" is that the addictive cynisism of Stewart and Colbert is no longer diverting our attention and distorting the gravity of the times. The easy gags are not cushioning the effects of bushco and for that alone, I am grateful. I think that ultimately, both sides will have to compromise in order to move forward. This is one strike which the Whitehouse won't mind letting drag on.

Posted by: Glenn Brandham on 12/27/07 at 4:37 AM Respond

"There is no need, or even point, to collective bargaining."

Sure, let the big five mega-multinational corporations screw over each writer individually?

The big corps need the chump change to increase their bottom line.

Let the writers and creative type negotiate each deal separately - I'm sure they could get as good a deal and the mega-dollar corps would never take advantage of them.

Posted by: capt on 12/27/07 at 5:57 AM Respond

Oh good grief. Writers are not the only employees of these shows. The return to the air is largely about generating the revenue needed to pay the salaries of all the other folks who would otherwise lose their jobs. You're so busy being snarky that you've ignored the simple reality of these people's lives. Shame on you.

Posted by: Deacon on 12/28/07 at 5:10 PM Respond