Conspiracy Watch: Were the Dark Ages Faked?
"Phantom time," Charlemagne, and a 300-year memory hole.
THE CONSPIRACY THEORY: No wonder the Dark Ages were so dark—they didn't really exist. The years between 614 and 911 never happened, yet due to some suspicious mathematical manipulation, they have been included in the Western calendar. To cover up the time shift, three centuries of fictional events and nonexistent figures like Charlemagne have been squeezed into the historical record. Reset your watches: We're actually living in the early 1700s.
THE THEORISTS: The idea of "phantom time" was first proposed in 1991 by a German historian named Heribert Illig and his colleagues. They claim that unexplained gaps in the archeological and documentary record confirm their hypothesis. So how did 297 empty years suddenly appear? The prime suspect is Holy Roman Emperor Otto III, who is commonly thought to have lived around 1000. Not so, say Illig and Co.: He actually lived around 700 but wished he lived at the time of the first millennium, so with the help of Pope Sylvester II, he added 300 years to the date. To help cover his tracks, he invented a convincing story about an eighth-century Frankish emperor named Charlemagne.
MEANWHILE, BACK ON EARTH: Needless to say, historians aren't convinced that a large chunk of the Middle Ages were faked. But if it's true, can I get a partial refund for that monster European History book I had to read in high school?
Kookiness Rating: 
(1=maybe they're on to something, 5=break out the tinfoil hat!)
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Maybe that'll be the Bush bio-writers approach.
That's what I would reccomend. Forget "being redeemed by History" or what-ever it is Bush think's is going to restore his legacy. Why not just hire some-one whom can blur the lines and sweep his time in office under the rug? I think alot people would go along with it, just to never hear of him spoken of again.
The reason the "Dark Ages"
The reason the "Dark Ages" left little remnant evidence behind is that there were few if any advances. Similar to "Nineteen-Eighty-Four". Everything stagnated. Children of the era would point out rusted ruins of previous machines and ask: "What is that?". Mommie would answer: "Nobody knows. Some people say it pumped water . . but do not repeat this . . it may be heresy..."
Gee, that's the period in
Gee, that's the period in which Mohammed lived, and Islam spread. All made up? Why did a European king, intent on filling 300 years with fictional events, invent Islam? And the Pope at the time went along with it!
Plus, they didn't know in 1000 CE that the Julian calendar was gently slipping out of synch with the cosmos. Yet when they later reset the calendar (to get onto the Gregorian calendar), the adjustment was made exactly as though the 300 fictional years had actually passed.
This is like Bennie Noakes in John Brunner's novel, "Stand on Zanzibar". Bennie Noakes was a perpetually-stoned solipsist. His reaction to actual current events was, "Christ, what an imagination I've got!" I understand his feeling: Whenever I think I've heard of everything, something even more astonishing comes along.
BureauCat : I'm amazed to
BureauCat : I'm amazed to discover someone else remembers "Stand on Zanzibar".
Where is Shalmanezar when we need it?
The New Chronology
The New Chronology (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_Chronology_(Fomenko)) is ten times crazier than Phantom Time.
I grew up in the sixties and seventies
I assure you, it never happened. The whole thing was faked. Just like the moon landing.
Jesus and Moses were faked too, including that whole thing with Egypt and the Burning Bush too. The creation story wasn't faked - it was stolen from the Babylonian creation myth, which was faked too.
They also faked the cold war. The last two elections were fake too. John Kerry and John McCain did not run for the Presidency.
There is only one thing you can trust to not be fake and that is Mexican Coca Cola.
Made up Charlemagne...
Made up Charlemagne... Priceless.
do I need anger management
Yes, I Agree
The Phantom time hypothesis is a conspiracy theory developed by Heribert Illig in 1991. It proposes that there has been a systematic effort to make it appear that periods of history, specifically that of Europe during Early Middle Ages (AD 614–911) exist, when they do not. Illig believed that this was achieved through the alteration, misrepresentation and forgery of documentary and physical evidence rocket spanish provillus receding hairline.
No wonder the Dark Ages were
No wonder the Dark Ages were so dark—they didn't really exist. The years between 614 and 911 never happened, yet due to some suspicious mathematical manipulation, they have been included in the Western calendar. To cover up the time shift, three centuries of fictional events and nonexistent figures like Charlemagne have been squeezed into the historical record.
