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Apparently the Vatican has finally decided that the best defense is a good offense.  According to a bellicose statement issued Monday, the Catholic Church doesn’t have a paedophilia problem, it has an ephebophilia problem, thankyouverymuch.  Plus this:

The statement, read out by Archbishop Silvano Tomasi, the Vatican’s permanent observer to the UN, defended its record by claiming that “available research” showed that only 1.5%-5% of Catholic clergy were involved in child sex abuse.

He also quoted statistics from the Christian Scientist Monitor newspaper to show that most US churches being hit by child sex abuse allegations were Protestant and that sexual abuse within Jewish communities was common.

Only 1.5-5%!  Not bad!  And anyway, Protestants and Jews are doing it too.  So there.

Admittedly, I’m not a theological expert, but to my ears this sounds only slightly more sophisticated than something you might hear from a red-faced five-year-old.  Augustine must be spinning in his grave.

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We can afford to take our time because we don’t report to oligarchs or corporations. We report to you, and for you.

And the stakes are high. Democracy is on the defense. We’ve been exposing corruption and scandal for five decades, and this is a pivotal moment in our country’s history. Will democracy prevail? We won’t wait for time to tell—independent journalism is essential for democracy, and we’ll keep doing our part to amplify the free press.

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