One Chicken Bone from the Presidency

In which our man Durst observes that Bush’s choice of running mate should mollify that underrepresented voting bloc — rich, balding white guys.

Fight disinformation: Sign up for the free Mother Jones Daily newsletter and follow the news that matters.


Bad timing. The day George W. picks a running mate, not only do the Mideast peace talks fail (what were the odds?), but the most famous plane in the world crashes, squashing Dubya’s prize photo-op down below the fold.

America had to wait through the Maxi Free commercial before Dan Rather got around to Bush’s choice for running mate.

And what a choice it was. The political equivalent of a 12- year-old copy of Reader’s Digest. Not to mention it’s the very same guy Bush tapped to head his own vice-presidential search team. Apparently Dick Cheney (and no Bush and Dick jokes here please) conducted an exhaustive search only to discover the best candidate was himself. I imagine the report was turned in with “Who Short Listed These Losers?” in red on the front.

Of course, we all know why George W. anointed the Dickster. Because Daddy told him to. The guy was not only Bush the Elder’s secretary of defense but chief of staff to Gerald Ford as well. What’s the deal here? It’s like the same 12 guys have been running the Republicans for 25 years. Every four years they switch positions, like in volleyball. “Rotate!”

Cheney looks more presidential than the guy whose shoes he’ll only be one fried chicken bone away from filling. And except for his positions and beliefs, he’d probably make a great chief executive. But if nothing else, the GOP has definitely nailed down that pivotal millionaire Texas oil baron voting bloc.

Cheney, chairman and CEO of the Halliburton Co., an oil-field services firm based in Dallas, supposedly told directors this week that he was leaving to take a government job, and nobody thought he meant a camp counselor position in Yosemite. This was immediately after he sold 100,000 shares of Halliburton stock, which netted him $5.1 million.

One can only hope this GOP precedent doesn’t compel Al Gore to feel obligated to pick his own search team leader, Warren Christopher. The man looks like a pathology project stitched together by Caribbean med school rejects. But I have a feeling he’ll go for the Cheney type. Any balding, white, career politico with glasses will do. Hey, George Mitchell, is that your phone ringing?

WHO DOESN’T LOVE A POSITIVE STORY—OR TWO?

“Great journalism really does make a difference in this world: it can even save kids.”

That’s what a civil rights lawyer wrote to Julia Lurie, the day after her major investigation into a psychiatric hospital chain that uses foster children as “cash cows” published, letting her know he was using her findings that same day in a hearing to keep a child out of one of the facilities we investigated.

That’s awesome. As is the fact that Julia, who spent a full year reporting this challenging story, promptly heard from a Senate committee that will use her work in their own investigation of Universal Health Services. There’s no doubt her revelations will continue to have a big impact in the months and years to come.

Like another story about Mother Jones’ real-world impact.

This one, a multiyear investigation, published in 2021, exposed conditions in sugar work camps in the Dominican Republic owned by Central Romana—the conglomerate behind brands like C&H and Domino, whose product ends up in our Hershey bars and other sweets. A year ago, the Biden administration banned sugar imports from Central Romana. And just recently, we learned of a previously undisclosed investigation from the Department of Homeland Security, looking into working conditions at Central Romana. How big of a deal is this?

“This could be the first time a corporation would be held criminally liable for forced labor in their own supply chains,” according to a retired special agent we talked to.

Wow.

And it is only because Mother Jones is funded primarily by donations from readers that we can mount ambitious, yearlong—or more—investigations like these two stories that are making waves.

About that: It’s unfathomably hard in the news business right now, and we came up about $28,000 short during our recent fall fundraising campaign. We simply have to make that up soon to avoid falling further behind than can be made up for, or needing to somehow trim $1 million from our budget, like happened last year.

If you can, please support the reporting you get from Mother Jones—that exists to make a difference, not a profit—with a donation of any amount today. We need more donations than normal to come in from this specific blurb to help close our funding gap before it gets any bigger.

payment methods

WHO DOESN’T LOVE A POSITIVE STORY—OR TWO?

“Great journalism really does make a difference in this world: it can even save kids.”

That’s what a civil rights lawyer wrote to Julia Lurie, the day after her major investigation into a psychiatric hospital chain that uses foster children as “cash cows” published, letting her know he was using her findings that same day in a hearing to keep a child out of one of the facilities we investigated.

That’s awesome. As is the fact that Julia, who spent a full year reporting this challenging story, promptly heard from a Senate committee that will use her work in their own investigation of Universal Health Services. There’s no doubt her revelations will continue to have a big impact in the months and years to come.

Like another story about Mother Jones’ real-world impact.

This one, a multiyear investigation, published in 2021, exposed conditions in sugar work camps in the Dominican Republic owned by Central Romana—the conglomerate behind brands like C&H and Domino, whose product ends up in our Hershey bars and other sweets. A year ago, the Biden administration banned sugar imports from Central Romana. And just recently, we learned of a previously undisclosed investigation from the Department of Homeland Security, looking into working conditions at Central Romana. How big of a deal is this?

“This could be the first time a corporation would be held criminally liable for forced labor in their own supply chains,” according to a retired special agent we talked to.

Wow.

And it is only because Mother Jones is funded primarily by donations from readers that we can mount ambitious, yearlong—or more—investigations like these two stories that are making waves.

About that: It’s unfathomably hard in the news business right now, and we came up about $28,000 short during our recent fall fundraising campaign. We simply have to make that up soon to avoid falling further behind than can be made up for, or needing to somehow trim $1 million from our budget, like happened last year.

If you can, please support the reporting you get from Mother Jones—that exists to make a difference, not a profit—with a donation of any amount today. We need more donations than normal to come in from this specific blurb to help close our funding gap before it gets any bigger.

payment methods

We Recommend

Latest

Sign up for our free newsletter

Subscribe to the Mother Jones Daily to have our top stories delivered directly to your inbox.

Get our award-winning magazine

Save big on a full year of investigations, ideas, and insights.

Subscribe

Support our journalism

Help Mother Jones' reporters dig deep with a tax-deductible donation.

Donate